Sweet baby seedlings.
This past week was a rough one. I struggled with classes, getting minimal sleep and feeling behind on everything - deriding myself for not starting my projects earlier, for not being able to manage getting only four or three or two hours of sleep a night, and for the certainty that the grades I'll receive from this week's assignments will bring my overall grades down and ultimately will most likely affect my GPA.
Yet there is a lesson here. I must remind myself that I tried hard. I pushed myself and I did the best with the time I had, and because of elements beyond my control, I was not responsible for all of the reasons I was behind. My eyes were suddenly opened this week to the fact that I think my grades define me. The idea of getting a low grade on an assignment, however large or small, makes me feel inadequate and unintelligent, incapable and lazy. I think too much about how teachers will see me when I do not do well in their classes; I in a strange and silly way believe that they will only like me if my grades are high. (Won't they like me for who I am as a person?)
What I need to learn is this: my character does not depend upon quantifiable "proof" of who I am. I am a hard worker. I am compassionate towards others. I am creative and kind and smart. I am a good person, and my grades in no way define me. (Also, it's ridiculous to ask my mind and body to function on just a few hours of sleep a night!)
In what ways do you define yourself? Are you gentle with yourself, or are you setting yourself up to impossible standards, like me? Be assured that you are, no matter what, a beautiful, unique, incredible soul and who is so, so loved. You are so very important to this world, as perfectly imperfect as you are!
This was taken two weeks ago - now the daffodils are in full bloom!
Other interesting things this week:
- Spring has officially arrived! How are you celebrating?
- iHanna wrote a really helpful how-to on altered books; I am hoping my next visit to the thrift store will result in my finding a perfect-for-me book to play in!
- This is a fantastic post about the rules of art journaling that you absolutely must read. (It's by the lovely Daisy Yellow, who will be teaching at 21 SECRETS with me!)
- I taught myself how to do a coptic binding stitch with this video. It's much easier than I thought it would be!
- I've been adding to my Flickr favorites for years, saving all those art journal pages that inspire me and/or show a new technique I'd like to try. Check the photos out here!
- 21 SECRETS opens on Friday! Woo! Sign up now!